Forgiveness in the Workplace: The Next Workplace Skill.

Forgiveness in the Workplace: The Next Workplace Skill.

model That people join companies and leave bosses is a saying still relevant today. Almost everyone has a story of a bad boss and I am no exception. A good number of my individual and team coaching clients also have a bad boss lingering around in their heads.

For some, the idea of forgiving your boss might be ridiculous. The boss has the power, he or she has done the wrong and you have to do the work of forgiveness??? Yes … that is what I am suggesting and after much reflection, research and conversation with friends and colleagues, I have pulled together 5 steps towards forgiveness:

  • P – Price you pay – That you pay a price for working for a boss who’s done you wrong might seem like an obvious statement and it is. The other, less obvious, meaning is the price you pay for not forgiving a boss who’s done you wrong. As Buddha once famously said, “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
  • O – Own your story – Unless we learn how to forgive our bosses, we are doomed to living out a “story” of unhealthy patterns that disempower us and leave us feeling like victims. We need to own the impact our boss has on us and change how we think and talk about it in order to reclaim our power.
  • W – Widen your view – We often see only a portion of the organizational complexity in which our bosses work. Our bosses are often dealing with situations, structures and people that exert a huge influence on how they behave and the decisions they make. This also applies to the wider view of their lives … we may not know the other general life complexities of our bosses.
  • E – Embrace frailty – We project a lot of “ideals” on bosses and then are disappointed that they show up as human beings. We need to embrace human frailty, our own and that of our bosses.
  • R – Release baggage – A large part of forgiveness is releasing negative emotions and thoughts and the idea that the past could have been different. This allows us to reclaim our own power and live more fully in the present.

Forgiveness - 19I have noticed that some people come to forgiveness, or at least letting go of things, without a lot of fuss. Others are like me, “recovering festerers”, those who find it difficult to put these ideas into practice. For some of us, we need more tools and activities to shift those negative patterns. Because of my own challenges and because I have spent the last 10 years coaching people who are struggling with a boss, I decided to explore this in more detail and have written a book. Well, actually, the book wrote me as it wasn’t until I began writing that I began learning more about the whole process of forgiveness.

If you are interested in the book, visit my  website  You are also invited to attend my book launch on December 1, 2015 in Victoria. Please register  here

Tammy Dewar ~ Calliope Learning
Box 151, 1581H Hillside Avenue
Victoria, BC
Canada
V8T 2C1

250-818-6239 (phone)

Team Values Connect

By Tania Walter Gardiner

As a business leader working with teams, what values do you work and live by? What is your vision? Mission? When there is agreement on vision, mission, and values the rest is small stuff. You can move effortlessly past any issues that arise.

 Vision, Values, Mission

Values define the ‘what’ and ‘how’ of the vision, connecting vision to actions. Action steps cannot be planned unless the team is in alignment, having values each member of the team can agree to. One tool that can assist a team to elicit values and develop a strong vision and mission is a charter.

A charter is a structure for agreements so that team members can be relaxed, resourceful and engaged. With these agreements, dialogue flows, moving forward in a productive way. Alignment fosters innovation, inspiration, and high performance. Teams that perform well enjoy their work, have better lives and create sustainable results through time.

Do you have a charter of agreements?

Do you have a charter of agreements with those you work with, whether stakeholders, a team of employees, or family business? Having a charter on how you agree to be with each other and work together deepens commitment, collaboration and contribution. Imagine a day-to-day experience of really contributing in your best way. What difference might that make in your business?

 

Contributing member: Tania Walter Gardiner, MA, BA, ACC
Tania is a certified professional solutions and values focused coach and consultant who works with individuals and teams helping them to gain clarity, focus and direction, enabling them to live their definition of success in business and life. To explore coaching with Tania, visit her website, Integral Connections.

Coaching for Results

By Tania Walter Gardiner

Coaching has emerged as a leading resource and skill-set for business leaders to live successful and extraordinary lives. You become clear on the results you want to create, why it matters and design a purposeful action plan to achieve your goals.

If you had empowering ways to commit to and achieve results in business and life, what would that make possible for you? As a beginning, I invite you to:

Become clear on your goals

Be clear of what you want in business and life, how will you get it, how will you know you have it, and what is your commitment to getting it. Design your business in a way that energizes you and creates the life you want. What is it you truly want to create for yourself?

Connect with what is important

Build a grounded foundation to make decisions that align with what you value most and ensure your daily actions are also in alignment with those values. This is the rocket fuel to engagement and commitment that creates breakthrough results. What is important to you about the outcome you aim to achieve?

Everyone could use a coach in their corner.

 

Contributing member: Tania Walter Gardiner, MA, BA, ACC
Tania is a certified professional solutions and values focused coach and consultant who works with individuals and teams helping them to gain clarity, focus and direction, enabling them to live their definition of success in business and life. To explore coaching with Tania, visit her website, Integral Connections.

**Please credit the author with any use of or excerpt from this article in

any form.
This article originally appeared in Valley Voice.